I hear so many different opinions when it comes to the dating material checklist. Some may think it's shallow and selfish. But many others, including myself will strongly say that it is a highly necessary tool you need to make when dating and seeking "Mr. Right", especially in our society and day in age.
Now, I'm probably the last person who has the right to tell you what should and shouldn't be on your checklist, and some things are absolutely up to your taste, but allow me to offer some advice for the sake of you not settling for any Joe-Schmo out there.
1) Think about his values
What does he stand strong for? What do you stand strong for? Do they match up? This is very important when looking for that person you will marry. If you find something good and desirable that you stand strong for, and he despises and fights against that same thing, there could be some trouble and red flags there. Think about the time he spends with his family. Does he value them? Life together may not be as fun as you think it could be with constant tension over things that are absolutely important in your belief and passions.
2) Think about his faith
Tying right in with his values is his faith. I couldn't imagine being married to my husband if he wasn't a Christian. Our whole lives revolve around our relationship with God. We make all our decisions around Him. When I'm struggling, my hubby will quote a verse, reminding me not to worry. When he's having a rough day, I'll write a verse on the mirror. That support system is SO incredibly important to me, and I know it is crucial for him. If I had to go to church alone, or not share in my relationship with God with my hubby, I would not be happy. The central part of my life is my relationship with Christ - it even comes before my relationship with my husband. The same goes for him. If my marriage wasn't centered around Christ, it would be very hard for me to have quality relationships with both.
3) Think about his priorities
What does this guy do with his time? What does he hold as important? Where does he like to be on a regular basis? Would he rather spend his time playing video games, or getting into God's Word? Most guys love playing video games, and that's all great, but does he intentionally build up himself and his faith in what he does? If a guy doesn't have any interest in growing himself and his relationships this could be a red flag. Does he put God first, then his earthly relationships? Do those things even rank in his life? If not, I wouldn't go there.
4) Think about his role models
Who are his heroes in life? If he looks up to men of the Bible, men of strong faith in his life, or those who walk their positive talk, that's a good sign. But if he finds identity in secular rap artist who curse every 2 words or super heroes, that could be a scary step, and I wish you well.
5) Think about his actions
Ok, so there aren't many guys (or girls) who haven't had those moments of weakness. Even the best of us have all said something stupid, done something dumb and carry embarrassing moments around. However, there is something to be said about a guy who gets into trouble with the law, drugs, and various relationships in his life. If he continually lives in such a reckless manner, you probably shouldn't date him. He may claim to be working towards a change. Great! So let him prove he can change, then date him. Don't EVER, EVER date a guy, thinking you will change him, or he will change for you because that will lead you into some deep, troubling waters. This concept is true for each of these things you consider.
Pin It
No comments:
Post a Comment